


Let's Play(and Maybe Make a Home)

by impalagirl, wilddragonflying



Series: Roleplays [36]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Derek Hale is a Good Alpha, Insecure Derek, M/M, Pack Feels, Slow Burn, Wolf Derek, dammit, full shift!derek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-05
Updated: 2016-05-05
Packaged: 2018-06-06 14:20:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6757615
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impalagirl/pseuds/impalagirl, https://archiveofourown.org/users/wilddragonflying/pseuds/wilddragonflying
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>"Hey, Derek?" Stiles called as he stepped into the loft, preoccupied for the moment by pulling his key out of the door. "Did I leave my phone here? 'Cause I--" He looked up at last, and froze. There was a fucking massive dog - no, wolf - on the couch. "Ummm."</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let's Play(and Maybe Make a Home)

Derek sighed to himself, curling up on the couch beneath an afghan. The betas were all out doing something with the humans of the pack-- bowling, Derek thought he'd heard, and he hadn't understood why Scott had flushed when Allison winked at him, but then again he didn't want to understand what went through teenagers' minds nowadays-- and had asked if Derek wanted to come with them. He'd declined, saying he was going to be working on organizing the books brought out of storage from the Hale vault; it wasn't a lie, he _had_ worked on the books, just... not for long before shifting to the new form he'd discovered-- full wolf, and the fact that his mother would be proud of him made the accomplishment bittersweet-- and letting himself just drift. It was slightly easier, in this form; the animal mind was a bit more dominant, and didn't care as much about the human worries.

Even his wolf, however, had seen and recognized the flash of sadness and disappointment that had crossed his betas' expressions before they'd left. _It doesn't really matter,_ he reminded himself firmly when he realized he was whining at the thought. _They're happy enough, and they'll stay happy-- they deserve it._ Even in his mind, he didn't need to remind himself that he didn't, not with everything that had happened.

He was jerked out of his musings by the sound of a key in the lock on the loft door; he picked his head up and glanced over the back of the couch, waiting to see who would come in-- he thought that everyone was going bowling.

"Hey, Derek?" Stiles called as he stepped into the loft, preoccupied for the moment by pulling his key out of the door. "Did I leave my phone here? 'Cause I--" He looked up at last, and froze. There was a fucking massive dog - no, wolf - on the couch. "Ummm."

Phone? Derek tilted his head before huffing and jumping over the back of the couch, trotting to the kitchen, pausing in the doorway to look back at Stiles.

Stiles stared back, his heart pounding. He knew those eyes; that was _Derek_ over there. He'd achieved a full shift without telling any of them? The man-turned-wolf in question huffed impatiently, and Stiles realised he wanted something. "Okay, okay, I'm coming." He followed Derek into the kitchen where, sure enough, his phone was sitting on the counter. He had to lean over Derek to grab it, and knocked the fruit bowl over in the process. "Shit, fuck, no!" he cried, making a wild grab for the fruit. Miraculously he caught a couple of oranges and a banana just landed on the counter, but an apple rolled straight onto the floor and across the kitchen.

Derek didn't think, trotting across the kitchen the grab the abused fruit gently with his mouth, bringing it back to the counter and lifting himself on his back legs (though he really didn't need to; the tops of his shoulders came up to Stiles's navel at least) to deposit the fruit back in the bowl, treating Stiles to an unimpressed look as he did so.

Stiles raised an eyebrow, mildly impressed, and then leaned over to knock the apple onto the floor again.

Derek growled, dropping back to the floor and jumping over the rolling apple, stopping it with his snout before grabbing it and depositing it back in the bowl again, glaring at Stiles and daring him to knock it to the floor again.

"Don't look at me like that," Stiles admonished. "You know you wanna play." And he did it again.

Derek snapped at the air next to Stiles's hand, but trotted after the apple again nonetheless; at this rate that apple was going to be wasted, but he had to admit it was nice to do something besides sit around and think. This time, just to be contrary, he let himself slobber on the apple a bit before dropping it on Stiles's shoe.

"That's disgusting," Stiles said. "I hope you know I'm not picking that up." Instead, he gently kicked the apple off his shoe and back over to Derek.

Derek chuffed, ignoring the apple as it rolled past him in favor of trotting through the living room and up the stairs to his bedroom, digging through the closet for an old tennis ball he remembered having. He found it, picked it up, and brought it back down to Stiles, nudging his hand with his nose demandingly.

Stiles had thrown the apple away during Derek's absence, kind of disappointed that he'd read what was happening wrong, but now he beamed, delighted. "So you _do_ wanna play!"

Derek huffed around the ball, lunging up to brace his forepaws against Stiles's shoulders while balancing on his back feet to keep most of his weight off of the teenager. He mouthed pointedly at the ball, all but shoving it in Stiles's face.

"Yeah, okay, I get it," Stiles sniped, taking the ball from Derek. "The apple was a dumb idea, but how was I supposed to know you had fetch-appropriate items in your house? You wanna take this outside or what?" 

Derek rolled his head in a mimicry of an eyeroll, dropping to all fours and padding over to the loft door, waiting for Stiles to come open it.

Stiles followed, hardly able to believe his luck.

* * *

They played fetch for most of the afternoon, Stiles easily forgetting all about the rest of the pack at the bowling alley. With Derek as a wolf Stiles did all of the talking, but that wasn't very much different to what it was like when Derek wasn't a wolf. It was a hell of a lot less awkward, though; it had taken Stiles too long to realise that Derek wanted to speak when the rest of the pack were around, but was holding back for some reason. Honestly, it was really nice to see him let go and be himself for a change - and he was a lot less intimidating when he was all furry and chasing after a ball with his tongue lolling out.

Derek didn't shift back when it was time for Stiles to go, just wandered back over to the entrance to his building and whined until Stiles let him in. It was weird, but Stiles wasn't going to question it, although he was worried that maybe Derek was stuck like that. It turned out the next day that he was not; when Stiles arrived at the loft for another fun-filled day of pack bonding, Derek was sitting in an armchair, human-looking once more and scowling like always. Stiles gave him a wave and sat down between Isaac and Scott on the sofa.

Isaac slung an arm over Stiles's shoulder as he sat down. "Where were you? We missed the chance to kick your ass at bowling," he said, faux-pouting; in his armchair, Derek tensed, then forced himself to relax. What if Stiles said something? He hadn't told the rest of the pack about his full shift, but that was only because it was extremely new-- it had happened for the first time after the last full moon, and Derek just... didn't know how to tell them.

Stiles slid his gaze over to Derek, weighing up his obvious desire for Stiles to keep quiet with the knowledge that Isaac and Scott would be able to hear a lie. He didn't want to betray Derek, though, so he shrugged and said, "I found this dog and spent the day playing fetch with it."

Derek almost melted with relief; Scott and Isaac were complaining good-naturedly about how they were more interesting than some random mutt, but Derek caught Stiles's eye and gave him a quick, grateful smile before burying his nose back in his book, content to be near his pack while they squabbled over the television they'd forced him to buy, spread out over the various cushions and furniture that had somehow migrated into the loft from everyone's homes. He grunted noncommittally when his opinion was asked for, eventually looking up from his book to actually look at the two DVDs that Stiles was holding up. "What are my options, again?"

" _Iron Man_ or _The Matrix_ ," Stiles said, waggling his eyebrows.

Derek thought for a moment. "Blue pill," he said after a moment, nodding.

"Excellent choice," Stiles declared, turning to thrust the DVD at Scott. "You heard your alpha. Decision made."

Scott looked surprised. "You mean he actually gave an opinion?" he asked. Stiles shot him a sharp look, and he flushed. "I mean, umm, I'll put it on."

Derek flushed as well-- his wasn't as noticeable beneath his dark skin and stubble, but the scent of mortification was unmistakable. He slouched down in his armchair, drawing his feet up under him and holding the book as a shield, but didn't say anything. That was one downfall of being so distant from his pack-- but Derek didn't know how to remedy it, and wouldn't even if he did.

Stiles was all too aware of Derek's discomfort for the rest of the day, even if the rest of the pack were not. When Erica demanded more drinks halfway through their third movie and Derek got up to comply, therefore, Stiles was quick to follow. "Hey," he said once they were alone in the kitchen. "Are you okay?"

Derek glanced at Stiles from the corner of his eye, shrugging one shoulder. "I should be used to it," he said quietly, all too aware of the super-hearing of more than half the occupants of the other room. "Thank you, for earlier, by the way."

Stiles shrugged. "No problem," he said easily. "It was a great dog. I hope I run into it again sometime."

Derek hid his small smile by rooting through the fridge for Boyd's Diet Dr Pepper. "Maybe," he said, voice slightly muffled.

"Maybe's good enough for me," Stiles said quietly, before slipping back into the living room. 

* * *

'Maybe' turned out to be the day after the next; Stiles had gone out with the pack, and Derek had had to run some errands(namely picking up yet more food; it was times like these that he praised Laura for insisting on investing all of her part of the insurance). But the day after that, Stiles came over while the rest of the pack were busy with various other things, and when Derek held up a new tennis ball(vigorously washed) questioningly, he'd disappeared upstairs to shift-- he didn't like wasting clothes, and he had the feeling that Stiles wouldn't appreciate Derek randomly stripping in front of him.

When Derek came back downstairs, he immediately headed for the door, waiting patiently by it for Stiles. Stiles just grinned and headed over to open the door, daring to pass a hand over Derek's head as he did so. Derek's fur was remarkably soft, and Stiles allowed his hand to linger for just a moment, giving the slightest scritch behind Derek's ear before pulling away. Derek leaned into the touch briefly before following Stiles down the hallway to the elevator and outside. It was a nice day, and Derek led the way down the street towards the park; his building was right on the edge of downtown, and about ten minutes' walk from the park.

They spent the next hour or so playing fetch, pausing every few minutes for Stiles to field questions and comments about his unusually large dog. He could tell that Derek wasn't too happy about it, but what could he say? Eventually the questions died down, and Stiles noticed Derek eyeing the far side of the park with what looked like longing. "Do you want to run?" he asked. Derek was fast, he already knew, but Stiles could only throw the tennis ball so far; it must not have been very satisfying for him. 

Derek perked up, but hesitated; he didn't want to just leave Stiles by himself. He glanced back to the other end of the park, then back at Stiles almost guiltily.

"You can go," Stiles encouraged. "I'd run with you but I think I'd die. Just make sure you come back, and try not to frighten any little kids."

Derek shot Stiles a grateful look before turning and trotting away, weaving his way through the people nearby until he had room to really stretch his legs. Then, he let loose, letting himself fall into an easy rhythm and running just for the pleasure of it for once.

One lady who had been near Stiles and Derek shot Stiles an inquisitive look. "Aren't you going to call him back?"

Stiles smiled. "I won't need to," he told the woman. "He knows not to go too far."

"Oh," she said, surprised. "Well-trained, then? I've heard some mutts are really hard to train. What's his breed?"

Stiles laughed and gave the answer he'd been giving all day. "God knows. He was a rescue, and they didn't know anything about him. He looks like he's got a bit of wolf in him though, doesn't he?"

"He certainly does," she agreed, smiling. "He's a very handsome dog; you're a lucky man."

Stiles sighed wistfully. "He's not mine," he confided. "I'm just looking after him for a while."

"That's too bad," the woman said sympathetically. "He seems to really like-- Bert! No, don't eat that!" With that, she darted off to hopefully catch her kid before he finished eating the piece of 'chocolate' he'd found on the ground.

Stiles suppressed a shudder and turned to look for Derek; Derek was on the far side of the park, by the duck pond, and entertaining himself by chasing the geese and letting them chase him in return; he never snapped at them, never used his teeth-- though he did growl and snarl. He wasn't completely stupid, but it wasn't until a park employee finally came over to yell at him and chase him off that Derek loped back to Stiles, tongue lolling and feeling happier than he had in a long time. 

Stiles grinned at the sight of him and couldn't resist bending to bury his hands in Derek's fur and give him a thorough petting. "You're fucking adorable, you know that?" he said conversationally. "Just a massive ball of fluff."

Derek huffed right in Stiles's face-- he was an _alpha;_ he wasn't adorable!

Stiles just laughed. "You're still super cute," he said, straightening up. "You ready to go home?"

Derek snorted, but nodded slightly, waiting for Stiles to grab whatever he'd brought before leading the way back to the apartment.

* * *

It was surprisingly easy to fall into a routine. Stiles would drop by the loft almost every day, making sure to pencil in some quality time with Derek's wolfy side even if they were due to have a pack bonding day. They were always sure to get back with plenty of time if that was the case, and although Derek always shifted while Stiles was there - upstairs, of course, and Stiles was starting to suspect that there was some degree of nakedness involved in the shifting process - he never acknowledged the hours they'd just spent together in the park when he came back down, human and clothed. Unless the rest of the pack were due to arrive, Stiles didn't stick around for long after that.

They definitely never spoke about it when the pack was around. Derek seemed reluctant to even let the others know that he was spending time with Stiles period, and it was clear he wasn't ready to share the news of his mastering the full shift. Still, Stiles was starting to get frustrated with the silent treatment. Derek was trusting Stiles with something huge, but he couldn't even talk to him when he wasn't a wolf. He'd already witnessed Derek's reluctance to use his voice when the rest of the pack was around, though, so he thought he might kind of get it - and he took Derek's options away from him.

"Man," Stiles said when Derek came back downstairs after a particularly energetic few hours at the park, making a huge show of stretching from his position on the sofa. Stiles had tried to run with Derek today, and he was definitely suffering for it. "I'm fucking _starving_. You wanna order a pizza?"

Derek froze, in the process of buttoning up his shirt-- he'd just grabbed a flannel shirt from his closet. The werewolf eyed the human on his couch warily, but nodded. "Sure. You're paying for one, though." Derek was starving, too, and would probably order at least two for himself. "Toppings?"

"Meat Lover’s," Stiles answered, kicking his feet up onto the sofa. "I'm so _sick_ of veggie pizza, you have no idea."

"Meat Lover's it is," Derek agreed, putting in an order for one pepperoni, two meat lover's and one Hawaiian.

"I'm stealing some of that Hawaiian, too," Stiles warned when Derek got off the phone.

Derek bared his teeth, but it was just the wrong side of intimidating. "You can try."

Stiles beamed. "Like you could refuse this face."

Derek rolled his eyes. "Yes, I can, actually," he pointed out. "I got you meat lover's, so you can sit there and eat that."

Stiles raised an eyebrow. "And those other three pizzas?" he asked.

Derek's eyebrow raised to match Stiles's. "You've seen how much the betas eat after a full moon," he said. "Alphas get the same way after a lot of exercise."

"You're going to eat _three_ pizzas?" Stiles demanded.

Derek shrugged. "Probably at least two. Whatever doesn't get eaten will be leftovers."

"As long as those leftovers are Hawaiian, that's all good with me," Stiles said, grinning.

Derek rolled his eyes. "Just for that, I'm gonna eat that pizza first," he retorted, completely unaware of the fact that he was nearly _flirting_ with Stiles, and definitely bantering in a friendly way.

Stiles wasn't quite as oblivious as Derek, but he was definitely enjoying it. This was the most he'd gotten out of Derek when the world wasn't about to end. "Asshole," he said playfully, tossing a cushion at Derek.

Derek just knocked it to the side with a grin.

* * *

Over the next few weeks, Stiles and Derek stuck to their new routine; Stiles would come over most days, they'd go to the park(if it was good weather, which it usually was) or they'd mess around the loft if the weather was bad. It was one day when they'd just gotten back from the park that the heavens opened up with a sudden summer thunderstorm; rain was falling hard enough that Derek actually half-feared it would beat right through the roof of the building. He was still in wolf form, but after a few moments' internal debate decided against shifting back; he just didn't really feel like walking up and back down the stairs. He'd pulled something while they were in the park, and had been walking a bit stiffly; unfortunately, because what he was experiencing was not a full injury, but rather a stretching of the muscles and ligaments and whatnot, the werewolf healing was working quite as fast as he was used to.

Derek used his teeth to pull several blankets and pillows off of the furniture, gathering them all into a nest in front of the television before flopping down in the middle of it, letting out a relieved sigh at being off of his feet, and letting himself relax.

Stiles had watched the whole process with a soft smile, utterly endeared. "You comfy over there?"

Derek heaved a sigh, looking at Stiles out of one eye before nodding slightly and readjusting himself so that there was room for Stiles to join him in the nest if he wanted to.

Stiles' eyes widened. "You want me to..?" he asked, unsure of how to finish.

Derek lifted his head and raised one eyebrow, glancing from Stiles to the now-open space with a pointed look before glancing at the surrounding furniture; he hadn't exactly left much.

"Okay, okay, I'm coming," Stiles huffed, kicking off his shoes before crossing the room to join Derek in his nest. It was surprisingly comfortable, and with Derek so close it was warm, too. "Happy now?"

Derek shuffled around until he could lay his head on Stiles's chest, flopping over on his side in the process before nodding. He'd missed this sort of behavior, just an easy intimacy with a packmate.

Stiles was a little more disturbed by this than he had been by anything else that had happened since he'd first walked in and found a wolf on the couch, but he definitely wasn't going to complain. Instead, he buried his fingers in Derek's fur and let himself relax. His eyes closed not much later.

They hadn't even turned the television on, but Derek couldn't find it in himself to care; the sound of Stiles's heartbeat evening out in sleep soon lured him under, especially when coupled with the rain overhead.

* * *

Things between them became a lot more physical after that. Derek as a wolf was much more likely to respond positively to any petting Stiles attempted to instigate, and had even started to demand ear scritches and belly rubs if Stiles wasn't showing him enough attention. Even more incredible was the fact that Derek had started touching him when he wasn't a wolf. Hands brushed against shoulders when they moved past each other in the kitchen, or squeezed arms or knees in support or agreement or encouragement or anything, really. Derek sat next to him at pack meetings now and was comfortable enough to let their thighs press together the whole time. Thankfully, Derek was also graceful enough not to mention the way Stiles' heart sped up whenever any of this happened.

A few weeks later saw Stiles' heart pounding for an entirely different reason. They were at the park, as usual, and some guy had approached Stiles to make a comment about how gorgeous Derek was. Stiles was used to this by now and had responded warmly, but it had taken him way too long to realise that he was being hit on and now the guy wouldn't leave.

"Listen," Stiles said for the fourth time. "I really should be getting back. Derek is my boyfriend's dog, and--" It was the wrong thing to say.

"So you're into guys?"

"Umm, yes, but I have a _boyfriend_ , so..."

"Your boyfriend doesn't sound like shit if he makes you walk his dog, alone." The guy's smile reminded Stiles weirdly of Peter. "Come on, let me take you out for a drink."

"You do know I'm underage, right?"

"A coke, then," the guy said smoothly. "I promise I'll have you home on time."

Derek hadn't liked this guy from the start, and the longer he hung around as Stiles tried to dismiss him, the more irritated Derek got, until he finally snapped-- literally. He and Stiles had never used a leash(Derek had chewed up the only one Stiles had ever tried to put on him, and had been tempted to pee on it for good measure, but they'd been indoors at the time), so there was nothing holding Derek back from snarling and then lunging forward, his teeth closing with a vicious _snap_ barely half an inch from the guy's thigh.

The guy leapt back with a startled yelp and almost fell on his ass. "What the fuck?!" he yelled. "Buy your mutt a muzzle, it's a fucking psycho."

Stiles smiled sweetly. "I'm so sorry," he said, though he didn't sound sorry at all. "He can be very territorial sometimes. Maybe you should go."

Derek advanced on the guy, hackles raised and teeth bared as he growled, not relaxing in the slightest until the man shouted something else and ran off, reeking of terror and humiliation. Even then, Derek only stopped growling, his hackles still raised, and walked back over to Stiles, crowding against his leg unhappily. He didn't like Stiles behind uncomfortable, didn't like Stiles afraid, didn't like people hitting on his human--

Wait.

 _His_ human?

Shit.

Stiles was all too aware of Derek's discomfort, and that was way more important than his own. "Okay," he said softly, smoothing a hand over Derek's head. "I think that's enough for today. Let's go home."

Derek pushed his head into the contact before nodding slightly and turning back in the direction of the loft, though he didn't stray far from Stiles's side. "Thanks for that, dude," Stiles said when Derek came back downstairs, human once more. "I thought he was never going to shut up."

Derek sighed. "I didn't like him," he confessed. "He smelled... off. Then when he wouldn't leave you alone..." He took a deep breath. "I may have... overreacted."

Stiles shrugged. "It would have been less socially acceptable for me to do that, and I wanted to, believe me."

That made Derek crack a smile, at least. "I... care about you," Derek admitted. "I didn't like seeing you uncomfortable."

Stiles' expression softened. "I care about you too, you big girl," he said, smiling. "So, thank you."

Derek stuck his tongue out at Stiles's insult. "Yeah, yeah," he muttered. "You're welcome." He couldn't help but feel that Stiles meant his 'caring' in a different way from Derek's-- but Derek wasn't even sure what his was to begin with.

* * *

It wasn't exactly news to Stiles that he had feelings for Derek. He'd been attracted to him since day one - _hello_ , the man was built like a Greek god - but the actual _feelings_ had started creeping in around the two month mark, when he'd held Derek up for over an hour in the pool. When Scott finally betrayed Derek to beat Gerard and Stiles had spent the rest of the night chewing Scott out for it, he'd been forced to acknowledge that he was screwed. He just hadn't realised how screwed.

He was realising it now. It was one of the rare days when the entire pack was busy, and Derek was taking the opportunity to spend the whole day as a wolf. Stiles had leapt at the chance to spend it with him, and was currently lounging in the nest Derek had made for them, fighting the urge to lavish attention on him. It was one thing for Stiles to know that he was falling head-over-heels for this softer, warmer version of Derek - but Derek definitely didn't need to.

Stiles wasn't as good at hiding his wants-- or at least the want to keep petting Derek-- as he thought; his hands kept twitching and he kept fiddling and shifting around and disturbing Derek's nap. Eventually, Derek huffed, annoyed, and stood up, moving so that Stiles was trapped under him before flopping down on the teenager, effectively pinning him. Derek glared at him half-heartedly before resting his chin on Stiles's shoulder and closing his eyes, taking a deep breath and letting it out.

This was the most physical contact they'd had to date, and _no_ Derek wasn't keeping track... much. He enjoyed Stiles's company, wanted more of it even, and he'd also gradually been starting to become more comfortable around the rest of his pack, joining in on discussions and even occasionally teasing and poking fun at the betas.

Stiles tried to give an indignant squawk at the sudden weight on his chest, but in the end he just sighed and gave in to the urge to pet Derek. "Thanks, buddy," he said softly.

Derek huffed, nosing just under Stiles's ear for a moment before letting himself drift off once more, struggling to push down the little bit of him that wanted _more._

* * *

Scott cornered Stiles in his bedroom the next day. "So, you still hanging out with that dog?" he asked, faux-casually as he pretended to scan the titles on Stiles's bookshelf.

"Umm, yeah," Stiles said, eyeing Scott warily. "He's pretty cute, so."

"Really? So you've been playing with him when you're not with us?"

"A fair amount, yeah."

"Then how come you don't smell like anyone but you and Derek?" Scott asked, feigning innocence.

Stiles froze. "The dog lives in Derek's building," he said truthfully. "So I hang out with him sometimes after I've seen the dog."

Hm. Stiles was telling the truth... "Still doesn't explain why you smell like _nothing_ but you and Derek," Scott pointed out. "No strange smells, nothing."

"Why does it matter?" Stiles asked.

"If you were spending as much time with a strange dog as you say, you'd smell like them," Scott pointed out. "You don't."

"Well, I can't explain that," Stiles said. "Maybe he's a figment of my imagination."

Scott was quiet for a moment. "I don't know about that," he said slowly, "but you're not lying when you say you're hanging out with a dog."

Stiles knew he'd been backed into a corner, and he didn't have any choice. He sighed. "Okay," he said. "If I tell you something, will you promise to keep it a secret?"

Scott hesitated. "Unless the pack needs to know," he conceded after a moment. 

"They don't," Stiles said quickly. "It's Derek's dog."

"Derek... has a dog?" Scott asked, confused. "I've never smelled one at his apartment."

"That's because it hasn't been there," Stiles explained. "It's complicated, and Derek doesn't want to say anything until it's a sure deal. But the dog's a lot like him, y'know? They both need some company."

Scott was quiet for a moment, before finally nodding. "Okay," he said finally. 

* * *

Stiles told Derek about Scott's probing, and Derek had grudgingly agreed that what Stiles had come up with was as good a way as any of putting Scott off the scent. It didn't work for long, though; not even a week after that, Stiles and Derek exhausted themselves at the park, went back to the loft and made another nest and then promptly went to sleep in it(a routine they'd established after the first time it'd happened). They'd thought the pack were off doing various things, but apparently the plans had changed; Derek was woken by the sound of the loft door being slid open, and panicked briefly, trying to decide if he should shift-- but a naked him on top of Stiles was something he didn't want to really think about, and he was out of time.

"Stiles?" Scott said, nudging the teenager with his shoe. "You've uh, got a little something on your chest."

Stiles woke with a start, nearly punching Derek in his furry face as he flailed. "Shit, Der-- Uhh. Wha-- No." He looked up at Scott, his heart and his mind racing. "Derek went out," he lied pathetically.

Scott-- and the rest of the betas-- treated him to a 'you didn't even try' look. Derek gave him one too before heaving a sigh and levering himself to his feet, disappearing upstairs to shift and get dressed before coming back down. 

Stiles had been doing a lot of talking without actually saying anything in the minutes it had taken Derek to get ready, and when Derek reappeared he finally fell silent. The whole pack turned as one and gawped at Derek for what felt like an age, until Lydia finally broke the silence.

"I _knew_ it!"

Derek winced at Lydia's exclamation. "I'm sorry," was the first thing he said. "I just... didn't know how to tell you guys."

"But you knew how to tell _Stiles_?" Isaac asked, hurt.

Stiles winced. "In his defence, he didn't actually tell me so much as I walked in on him while he was shifted."

Derek tilted his head towards Stiles. "That's true," he admitted. "But he's been... helpful."

"So Derek was the 'dog' you were spending time with," Scott concluded. Stiles nodded.

"But _Stiles_?" Isaac whined.

Stiles glared at him. "Hey. Fuck you."

Derek fixed Isaac with a look. "He's pack," Derek said firmly. "I've only been able to fully shift for the past few months. I didn't know how to tell any of you because..." Here, he hesitated again, before finally admitting out loud for the first time, "Because I didn't feel like I deserved you. I'm your alpha, but after everything that's happened..."

Stiles was at Derek's side in an instant. This was the first time Derek had given voice to the insecurities Stiles knew had been weighing on him ever since he'd gained his alpha status from Peter, and if _anyone_ said the wrong thing right now Stiles was going to punch them in the throat. To his surprise, though, and to the pack's credit, they all rushed forwards as one to surround their alpha and shower him with reassurances.

"Nothing that's happened was your fault, Derek," Erica told him firmly.

"You're a _great_ alpha," Isaac agreed.

"Maybe I hated you at the beginning, but I always respected the hell out of you," Scott piped up helpfully.

Boyd waited until everyone else had fallen silent to speak. "Things were hard at the beginning," he said slowly, standing opposite Derek and meeting his gaze with quiet confidence. "You had no idea what you were doing and neither did we. But we've grown together as a pack, and we've become strong and successful, and we wouldn't have been able to do that without you. Yeah, you were a bit of a fuck up at first, but you were exactly what we needed. And we still need you, and we always will."

Derek choked back a sob, leaning into the comforting weight of his pack-- _his_ pack-- and nodding. "Thank you," he whispered, offering Boyd a grateful-- if slightly tearful-- smile.

Stiles smiled to himself, more than pleased. He had a feeling that pack snuggles were about to become a thing. He was right.

* * *

Things did get a little better after that-- the pack started insisting on including Derek in their regular outings, and the giant nest in the middle of the living room was regularly utilized on pack nights. Derek honestly hadn't felt this happy since before the fire, before Kate. It was affecting the rest of the pack, his happiness: they were all happier, too, for the most part.

There was just one sore point, however: Isaac. He seemed resentful that Stiles had been the first to learn(albeit inadvertently) about Derek's full shift. What Derek didn't know was that the whole pack had been picking up for months now on the tension between Derek and Stiles, the tension that was all too familiar from Scott and Allison and Lydia and Jackson, and Isaac wasn't too happy about that, either. He felt slighted, like Stiles was stealing all of Derek's attention(even if Derek didn't mean to give him any more attention than he did the rest of the pack, and Stiles wasn't aware he was stealing it.). It came to a head about two months after the pack had learned about his full shift; it was the middle of the month, so Isaac didn't even have the excuse of the full moon to excuse his behavior towards Stiles that day. He'd been inexcusably rude to Stiles, snubbing and insulting him with every breath, and Derek had finally had enough. He hated having to get physical with Isaac now, not when Derek had finally realized that Isaac still had nightmares about his father, and still flinched at any rough treatment, but Derek needed Isaac out of there and somewhere private. They'd been at a diner, and when they were leaving Derek latched onto Isaac's upper arm, preventing him from getting into the car with Scott like he'd been planning to.

"I need to talk to Isaac," he said smoothly when the rest of the betas looked at him questioningly. "I'll take him back when we're done."

Stiles met Derek's gaze, his eyes wide. He didn't speak, but the question was obvious. _Do you need me to stay?_

Derek offered Stiles a quick smile and a small shake of the head. _I can handle this._

Stiles nodded and left with the others, leaving Isaac still being held by Derek. "You can let go now," he said tersely, wrenching his arm from Derek's grip. "Why couldn't I go with the others?"

"Because I needed to talk to you," Derek repeated. "You've got a problem with Stiles."

"Says who?" Isaac asked.

"Says me, says your behavior," Derek answered, fighting the urge to cross his arms; he didn't want to intimidate Isaac, or appear to be trying to. He wanted to have an honest conversation, get to the bottom of this. "You've been acting this way for a while, but it's been getting worse over the past few months. It's affecting the rest of the pack."

Isaac looked guilty. "I don't mean for it to," he admitted. "I just... Is it normal to have humans in a pack?"

"Absolutely," Derek said. "I know of very few packs who don't have at least one human in them."

"Well, we have one human," Isaac said. "We have Allison."

"Stiles is human, too," Derek pointed out. "Regardless of being a spark."

Isaac sighed. "Exactly. Do we really need him?"

Derek stared at Isaac in shock. " _What_ did you just say?" he demanded.

"You keep coddling him because he's a human, and _that's_ affecting the rest of the pack," Isaac accused. "Allison's different, she knows how to protect herself, but Stiles is as weak as a kitten. He's a liability!"

"Remind me again who usually figures out what the creature is and how to beat it," Derek said before forcing himself to take a deep breath. "Yes, Stiles is clumsy and doesn't have Allison's training or our powers. No, that doesn't make him a liability-- there are other ways to be strong."

"So if he's so strong, why are you all over him all the time?" Isaac demanded. "'Do you want a drink, Stiles?' 'Are you warm enough, Stiles?' 'Do you want to sit next to me?' 'Do you want to be singled out as the only person special enough to know about one of the most important things that has ever happened to me, Stiles?' Fuck, Derek, it's like you're in--" Isaac cut himself off, his eyes wide. "Oh my God, you're in love with him, aren't you?"

Derek was stunned into silence, first by Isaac's tirade, then by his accusation. "What--" His first instinct was to deny it, but Isaac would be able to hear the lie. "Okay, yes, I am. Yes, I trust him a lot, and yes, I love him. But that doesn't make him more important than any other member of the pack."

"So stop treating him like that!" Isaac whined, and yes he was fully aware that he sounded like a child, thank you very much. "You spent hours and days with just Stiles for months. You've never spent that much time with mm-- with the rest of us."

Isaac's stutter caught Derek's attention, and he looked at Isaac in surprise for a moment before his expression softened. "You're right," he said. "I'm sorry."

Isaac looked down, like he felt bad. "I get that he's important to you," he said quietly. "But sometimes the rest of us want to know that he's not the only one."

Derek followed his instincts, stepping forward to tug Isaac into a hug. "You are," he said quietly, but no less firm for it. "You are important to me, Isaac."

Isaac closed his eyes and let himself be hugged for a long moment. At last he pulled back to look Derek in the eye, a weak smile on his lips. "You should tell him."

"I will," Derek said, not letting Isaac go far, "but come on; wanna go back to loft and watch some movies?"

Isaac flushed, but his smile widened. "Yeah. Yeah, that sounds good."

Derek smiled in return, slinging a friendly arm around Isaac's shoulders and leading him to the Camaro.

* * *

Derek had been acting weird lately. He'd told Stiles about Isaac's issues, and Stiles had completely understood, had actively encouraged Derek to spend more time being an alpha to the rest of his pack, but he'd also gotten the feeling that Isaac wanting more attention wasn't the whole story. Derek hadn't been avoiding Stiles, exactly, but he hadn't been behaving normally around him either.

Stiles had grown used to the easy affection they shared, the casual touches and the space invasion and the naps taken with or without the pack in their nest. Since Isaac's conversation with Derek, however, all of that had stopped. Maybe Isaac was jealous of Stiles, but did that explain the way Derek was absolutely refusing to touch him? Derek wasn't the kind of person to let someone else stop him from doing something he wanted to do - so did that mean that Derek hadn't wanted to be touching Stiles all this time, and was glad of the excuse to stop?

It didn't take Stiles long to realise that all of this speculation was doing him no good, and that it would just be easier to get direct answers straight from the source. So he hung back one evening after the rest of the pack had left, and waited pointedly until Derek turned to look at him to speak. "Is there something wrong?" he asked.

Derek briefly debated attempting to put this conversation off, but decided it wouldn't do any good. "Not... _wrong,_ exactly," he conceded. "I just... had some things occupying me."

"Things like what?" Stiles demanded. "Things like how you can't even stand to touch me anymore? Because you can just say that, y'know. Instead of letting me humiliate myself with the hopeful puppy face I get every time you walk into a room and _don't_ sit near me. Lydia had to tell me about that one, which was great, by the way."

"What?" Derek asked, shocked. "No, Stiles-- god, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel like that; I was stuck in my head, I'm sorry."

Stiles deflated a little. "Then what is it?" he asked. "Can you talk about it?"

Derek hesitantly took a step towards Stiles; this was it, he knew. This was his chance. "I... Yeah," he said. "Isaac... forced me to admit something out loud."

Stiles blinked. "What kind of something?"

Derek swallowed. "Something like... like how much attention I pay you. Something like how much I love you."

Stiles' jaw dropped. "I'm sorry," he said. "How much you _what_ me? Did you mean hate? Because it's a fine line and everything and now is your chance to rectify your mistake, no hard feelings, or else I won't be held responsible for my actions."

Stiles's babbling made Derek hopeful. "How much I love you," he repeated. "No mistake."

"As a friend?" Stiles asked desperately, his voice high and strangled. "A brother?"

Derek shook his head, slightly amused. "No, on both counts."

Stiles raised his gaze heavenward, sending prayers of thanks to a god he hadn't even believed in five minutes earlier. "I really hope this isn't a joke because I'm so in love with you," he blurted.

Derek's smiled widened, and he stepped forward, taking one of Stiles's hands in his own. "It's not a joke," he promised.

Stiles also stepped forward, until they were standing chest-to-chest. "That's pretty amazing," he said softly.

Derek's expression softened. "It is," he agreed, bringing their entwined hands up so that Derek could rub his cheek against Stiles's fingers affectionately. 

Stiles smiled, soft and sweet, and leaned in to press a light kiss onto Derek's lips.

Derek returned the kiss, his free hand coming up to cup Stiles's neck, thumb stroking over the skin behind Stiles's ear. When they parted, Derek didn't go far. "That was everything I was hoping for," he admitted in a murmur. 

"And more," Stiles whispered back, kissing Derek again. He huffed out a little laugh when they broke apart. "God, that was cheesy."

Derek smiled. "Cheesy doesn't mean bad," he reassured Stiles.

Stiles laughed. "Who are you and what have you done with Derek Hale?"

Derek rolled his eyes, his expression fond. "Oh, hush."

For once Stiles complied, and kissed Derek again. 

* * *

Things changed, after that-- Derek was certain to spend more one-on-one time with his betas, to help make up for spending so much time alone with Stiles. It helped quite a bit; Isaac quit picking on Stiles, and the rest of the pack was happier for it and Derek's attention; Derek hadn't even realized how much it was affecting the pack. Stiles reclaimed his spot next to Derek in the nest on pack nights, and they were free with affection, both with each other and the pack(the former led to several complaints about how they were beating out Scott and Allison for Most Disgustingly Cute Pack Relationship). Overall, things were good.

There really was one point that Derek kept getting tripped up on-- besides constantly worrying for Stiles's safety whenever they had to deal with whatever monster had decided to attack Beacon Hills that month. Stiles's age. He was a year older than Derek had been when Kate had happened, but that wasn't exactly what was bothering Derek.

Okay yes, that was definitely part of it-- he didn't think the Sheriff would appreciate it if Derek de-virginized his underage son.

Which was another problem.

Derek was pretty sure he would be Stiles's first-- Stiles had never smelled of anyone but himself whenever the scent of sex was also present, which usually meant he'd recently jerked off. But while Stiles was certainly old for his years, he was still young. Really young. _That_ was what bothered Derek the most: Stiles was young and inexperienced. It made Derek feel a little too much like he was in Kate's position this time around, although he knew that he had no designs on Stiles or his family. He also couldn't help feeling like it was _wrong_ somehow for them-- even fully consenting-- to do anything more than kissing.

Derek's preoccupation with these issues eventually bled into all of his interactions with Stiles. Stiles could tell that Derek was tense, but didn't know how to broach the topic without pushing Derek too far. He'd eventually had enough, though, and cornered Derek one night after the rest of the pack had left. "Okay," he said. "What's eating you?"

 _I really should have seen this coming,_ Derek mused, sitting back down on the couch. "Our relationship," he said honestly. "I really care about you, and I want you, but..."

Stiles' heart sank like a stone and settled somewhere around his navel. "Is this you breaking up with me?" he asked quietly.

"No!" Derek almost-shouted in his haste to reassure Stiles. "No, God no, I'm not breaking up with you," he added, a bit calmer. "I'm just... You're young, Stiles. You've got your whole life ahead of you."

"And what?" Stiles asked. "You don't want to hold me back? That's bullshit, Derek; that's insulting."

Derek shook his head. "No, I know that," he said, trying to explain. "That's not what I'm trying to say. I... What I'm trying to say is that-- are you _sure_ this is what you want? Because you have to know that wolves-- that _I_ don't just do short-term."

"That's insulting, too," Stiles pointed out. "Of course this is what I want. I know your relationship history, I wouldn't even _entertain_ the idea of this if it was just going to be some fling. I _love you_ , Derek."

Derek thought back on his words, wincing. "You're right, I'm sorry," he apologized, sighing. "I'm just-- I think part of me is worried about this ending up... bad for us."

" _Okay_ ," Stiles said slowly, sitting back. "So you're worried about what will happen if we break up?"

Derek shook his head, burying his face in his hands. "No, that's not it," he said, frustrated-- he knew what he was worried about, but he couldn't find the words to actually say it. "I'm worried I'll end up like Kate and take advantage of you," is what he ended up blurting out. He probably could have worded that a bit better, but it was too late now.

Stiles could do nothing but gape at Derek for several long moments. "No," he said at last. "Derek, no way. You're nothing like Kate, you would never take advantage of me. Everything that we do, we'll both want."

"You're underage and a virgin," Derek argued. "How could you know what you want? I didn't."

Stiles' expression softened, and he shuffled forwards on the couch until he could take Derek's hand. "You're not Kate," he said again. "She manipulated you to her own ends. I trust you to give me the space and support I need to decide for myself what I want."

Derek took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as he carefully tightened his hold around Stiles's fingers. "Thank you," he said quietly. "For believing in me. And just for the record, I love you, too."

Stiles smiled. "I know," he said gently. "And listen. When we start thinking about taking things further, that's a decision we'll make together. If you're not ready, even if I am, that's completely okay."

Derek offered Stiles a grateful smile. "Thanks," he repeated. "That sounds... That sounds good."

Stiles nodded and pulled Derek into a hug.

* * *

A weight seemed to have been lifted from Derek's shoulders after that. Things between him and Stiles became more relaxed, almost more natural now that Derek wasn't obsessing over everything they did. Things became so relaxed, in fact, that Stiles wasn't surprised in the slightest when a heavy make out session resulted in sticky jeans for the both of them. "Well," Stiles sighed after they'd kicked off their jeans and collapsed back onto Derek's bed. "That was a development."

Derek couldn't help but chuckle, slightly breathless. "Yes," he agreed. "Yes it was."

"Good development?" Stiles asked, rolling until he was in Derek's arms.

Derek thought it over for a moment. "Yeah," he decided. "You?"

Stiles grinned. "Yeah."

They were quiet for a few moments before a thought finally managed to completely cross Derek's mind. "That was your first time, wasn't it?"

Stiles hummed. "I've never gone further than kissing before."

"Oh." Derek wasn't quite sure how to feel about how... _pleased_ that made him. 

Stiles tilted his head back to look Derek in the eye. "What?" he asked. 

Derek hesitated, but admitted, "I feel a little guilty for liking being your first so much."

Stiles laughed. "I like it, too," he said. "An older guy with so much more experience than me... It's kind of hot."

Derek couldn't help but chuckle a little at that. "So... no regrets?"

"Definitely not," Stiles promised. "Unless you have regrets?"

Derek shook his head. "No regrets," he promised. 

Stiles smiled and stole a kiss. "I love you."

* * *

Just because Derek and Stiles both liked the fact that Derek was Stiles's first didn't mean that Derek's guilt went away immediately; in fact, he didn't think it would ever _completely_ go away. But that was all right; Stiles was more than patient enough to help Derek through the guilt. Repeated exposure seemed to help quite a bit too, and they got _plenty_ of that in the weeks leading up to the full moon.

During that full moon, as had been done since the rest of the pack finally found out about Derek's new ability, they all went out to the Preserve; Stiles generally stayed at the Hale house while the pack ran rampant through the forest, chasing each other and the other wildlife(although they usually didn't bring any presents back to Stiles). After the moon went down, everyone piled into the Jeep or Scott's mom's car or the Camaro and headed back to the loft, where puppy piles followed until midday when they'd all traipse to the local diner for brunch.


End file.
